Lynn Serafinn's Cosmic Journey

Is Striving For Perfection Choking You?

Allison Maslan

By guest blogger Allison Maslan

Note from Lynn: The exciting launch of Allison’s new book, Blast Off! The Surefire Success Plan To Launch Your Dreams Into Reality is coming THIS Tuesday, January 19. To find out how you can buy the book and receive more than 20 beautiful mind-body-spirit gifts during the launch, go to www.myblastoff.com/booklaunch.

Are you living your life to the fullest at this moment in time? Do you have the life that you have always dreamed of? If so, congratulations! Meditate a few moments each day on the goodness that you have experienced from your great fortune. If your answer is no, it is never too late to start. So many of my coaching clients tell me they don’t reach their goals because they want everything perfect before they move forward.

They are striving for perfection and it is killing them. They want a perfectly clean house, to say the perfect words and to do perfect work at all times. What is the point of “perfect” anyway? Pressure filled expectations are a sure way to turn any goal into a ball and chain. Many people resist attempting new challenges or setting new goals because they are afraid they will not perform to their ridiculous level of expectation.

As a result, they give up before they ever begin. Then the feelings of disappointment and failure set in. I started taking modern dance in my 30s. The room was full of young women and men that had been dancing since childhood. My mind was aghast as the dance instructor got in front of the class and proceeded to dance several eloquent steps that we were supposed to immediately mirror. I knew I was in trouble as the class was spinning one way and I was tripping the other way (Picture I Love Lucy and the Rockettes).

Through this experience, I learned to laugh at myself and let go of the notion of doing it perfectly. It was not possible for me to keep up with these experts; and attempting to do so was way too much pressure. Once the light bulb came on that I could do something for the fun of it, I relaxed about the outcome. And wouldn’t you know it, I was able to perform in several dance presentations and I had a blast.

If you are not putting yourself out there, reaching toward what you really want because you are afraid of not being perfect, you are missing out on the juiciness of your life. It is the non-perfect part that will be most memorable and uniquely you.

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Allison Maslan, HHP, CCH is a homeopathic physician and the author of Blast Off! The Surefire Success Plan To Launch Your Dreams Into Reality. As a life and business coach, she helps people create a new business and the best chapter of their lives.

The exciting launch of her book, Blast Off! The Surefire Success Plan To Launch Your Dreams Into Reality is coming Tuesday, January 19. To find out how you can buy the book and receive more than 20 beautiful mind-body-spirit gifts during the launch, go to www.myblastoff.com/booklaunch.

Intentions for a Wonderful New Decade

I can hardly believe that we are now into the second decade of the new millennium. It seems like only yesterday I was watching the fireworks over London (on TV) as we passed from the 20^th century into the 21^st. I don’t know about you, but I have a truly wonderful feeling about this next decade. I’m going to be 55 this month (happy birthday wishes graciously accepted), which means that this decade is “traditionally” the time when someone my age would be moving towards retirement. Well I can tell you right now I have no intention of retiring at age 65. In fact, I feel like I’m just getting warmed up! Both my energy and my spirits are high, and I feel full of optimism and hope as we step into the “teenies”.

To honour the coming of the new decade, I decided to set some intentions. To keep me focussed and balanced, I decided to use the four principles of “Give, Receive, Become and Be” from my book The Garden of the Soul as a foundation for those intentions. I’d like to share them with you here.

My intention for the Principle of Giving

I have learned that true “Giving” means to listen deeply to people’s hearts and give them what they truly want, rather than imposing what my ego tells me what I think they need. This decade, I make the intention to give to everyone I meet, from my heart to theirs.

My intention for the Principle of Receiving

I have learned that true “Receiving” means to open my eyes and ears to become aware of the boundless gifts being sent to me at every moment of my life. This decade, I make the intention to allow myself to receive, with wonder, joy and gratitude, all the Universe offers me.

My intention for the Principle of Becoming

I have learned that we cannot “Become” or grow unless we let go of old ways of thinking that do not serve us and keep us stuck in a treadmill. This decade, I make the intention to let go of old stories I have about myself and the world, and to become extraordinary in ways I had never before imagined I could.

My intention for the Principle of Being

I have learned that “Being” means to know and love the Self regardless of the multitude of labels we use to describe ourselves, and to be aware of who we are no matter what challenges surround us. This decade, I make the intention to be me, and only me, and to see you as only you.

Thank you for allowing me to share my intentions with you. I had an ulterior motive for doing so. You see, I know that the true power of intentions comes when you share them with others. And I really, really want to be able to be mindful of these intentions, because I know they sometimes might not be so easy to remember. The fact that you have heard them means there is more power behind them, so thank you for reading.

Try it out for yourself. Make your intentions for the new decade, and then share them with special and supportive people in your life. Then see how much this action helps you to be mindful of your promises to yourself. And what’s even more interesting is that we don’t necessarily have to share our intentions with other people (although it’s always good to, because they can hold us accountable). If you prefer, you can go out into Nature and shout your intentions to the moon, the trees, the birds, the ocean or whatever has meaning and energy for you. Or, if you are the kind of person who likes to pray or meditate, state your intentions to Spirit, in whatever form is true for you. No matter how you state your intentions, when others bear witness to our sincere expression of them, it’s as if the Universe has etched our words into our cosmic diaries, and holds us firmly on our true course in life.

And of course, you are MOST welcome to share your intentions with me below in the comments! I’d love to be your “intention buddy.”

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Is one of your intentions in 2010 to start writing a spirit-based book? Maybe you’ve already written it and you are ready to find out how to publish and promote your book. Or maybe, you’ve just started your writing journey by keeping a diary, a blog or other journal of your thoughts, feelings or creative ideas. No matter where you are in your writing journey, I’d like to invite you to visit Spirit Authors, my brand new Virtual Coaching and Learning Experience just for mind-body-spirit writers.

We are having a fantastic Spirit Authors Grand Opening Webinar Week from Monday 22 February through Friday 26 February, where you can hear (for fr*ee) over a dozen top mind-body-spirit industry professionals, from authors, to publishers, to editors, to marketers and more, all talking about spirit-based books, from writing to publishing to promotion. You’ll also find out how you can join the new Spirit Authors membership site, bringing you bespoke courses, business resources, and great opportunities for both personal and professional networking, all aimed at writers in the mind-body-spirit genre.

To make sure you don’t miss our Grand Opening, be sure to come over to www.spiritauthors.com and sign up for our news updates, so you can receive a VIP invitation to this very special Grand Opening Webinar Week.

Holiday Survival Guide – Pt 4 of 5 – Stress over Money

5 Easy Ways to Beat the Blues and Feel Joyous this Holiday Season-  Part 4 of 5
by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

Well, as we move into the last week of the holiday season, we move into the penultimate article in our series of tips to help you beat the blues over the holidays:

1. Holiday Blues Number 1: Seasonal Affective Disorder (”SAD”) posted 6 December
2. Holiday Blues Number 2: Seasonal Illnessess, posted 10 Dec
3. Holiday Blues Number 3: Family “Dramas” (posted 27 Dec)
   
4. Holiday Blues Number 4: Stress over Money in today’s post
5. Holiday Blues Number 5: Feelings of Isolation (coming Thursday 31 December)

TIP: If you want to receive all 5 articles, be sure to subscribe to this blog in the box on the right hand side of your screen.

Let’s face it. Sometimes we spend money during the holidays as if we had an unlimited supply of cash. But then, the bills start to arrive. And while we might have felt bright, bubbly and festive when we did our holiday shopping, when we begin to assess the financial “damages”, our euphoria can rapidly turn into stress, and even guilt, making it impossible for us to feel the joy of the season.

I’m pretty sure just about all of us have experienced such “buyer’s regret” at one time or another in our lives when we have purchased something and thought twice about it after the fact. At other times of the year, if we bought something and had regrets about it afterwards, we could usually return it if we wished. But with holiday spending, this isn’t so easy, as most of our spending is on gifts for others, or on holiday consumables like food, drink and entertainment. We cannot return these items and get our money back.

So, how can we relieve ourselves from this stress and guilt? Continue Reading…

Holiday Survival Guide – Pt 3 of 5 – Family Dramas

5 Easy Ways to Beat the Blues and Feel Joyous this Holiday Season
by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

SO sorry this is late! I actually thought I had posted it before Christmas. So, you’ll be getting 2 posts back-to-back, one today, one tomorrow.

Today we continue our series of tips to help you beat the blues over the holidays:

1. Holiday Blues Number 1: Seasonal Affective Disorder (”SAD”) posted 6 December
2. Holiday Blues Number 2: Seasonal Illnessess, posted 10 Dec
3. Holiday Blues Number 3: Family “Dramas” (in today’s post)
4. Holiday Blues Number 4: Stress over Money (coming Monday 28 December)
5. Holiday Blues Number 5: Feelings of Isolation (coming Thursday 31 December)

TIP: If you want to receive all 5 articles, be sure to subscribe to this blog in the box on the right hand side of your screen.

Surviving Family Dramas during the Holiday Season
For many people, visiting with relatives during the holidays is a wonderful experience, because it allows them to reconnect with loved ones they might not ordinarily see during the rest of the year. But for many others, visiting with parents, siblings and extended family can bring out the worst in us. It’s as if we’ve travelled back in time. We might be the most powerful and respected person in our professional life, but somehow when we are around our childhood families, we change into blithering idiots. By dint of some inexplicable time-warp, we get caught up in the age-old “family dramas” that drive us absolutely batty and leave such a horrible aftertaste when we go back home to our “adult” world. Within minutes, we manage to regress into a juvenile version of ourselves that never shows up under any other circumstances. But what is worse is that we find it nearly impossible to get out of the age-old scripts we have played out since our youth.

Small wonder why I chose to speak about this in a Holiday Survival Guide!

Getting “hooked” into a role
When we get stuck into a family drama, I call it being “hooked.” The reason why we get hooked into our family dramas lies in the term “drama” itself. Think of what a drama is. It’s not merely a judgemental word; it’s actually a very accurate description of what is taking place. A drama is a complex story with complex characters. And our family dramas are no different. When we are hooked, it means we have taken on the role of one of these characters. And, yes, there are cliché roles in which people tend to be cast. Continue Reading…

BOOK REVIEW – Blast Off by @AllisonMaslan

Author and Coach Allison Maslan Helps You ‘Blast Off’ in 2010

by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

Like this article? Share it with others

These days, the market is flooded with self-help books. Unfortunately, all too many of them leave me feeling dull and lifeless, and they don’t really “help” very much. Half of the books I come across hit you over the head with “power talk” that makes you feel guilty for not being rich or for getting the occasional cold (I won’t mention names, but I have indeed tossed more than one self-help book across the room because of this!). The other half usually drown you in lofty “woo woo” language that never quite gets down to practical action. Frustrating! For a new self-help book to stand out from the crowd and become keeper in my library, it would need to be friendly, engaging, fun AND practical. In other words, it would actually have to HELP me help myself. In her new book Blast Off! The Surefire Success Plan to Launch Your Dreams into Reality, author, coach and registered homeopath Allison Maslan, has achieved exactly that. Her book is a step-by-step programme to achieving some of the most challenging and important goals in life: Continue Reading…

Holiday Survival Guide – part 1 of 5

5 Easy Ways to Beat the Blues and Feel Joyous this Holiday Season

by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

Author Patrick Dennis somewhat sarcastically referred to the winter holidays as “The Joyous Season” in his 1960s book of the same name. Most of us inwardly believe that Christmas and the winter holidays are indeed meant to be joyous. But in actuality, many people have a rough time during the holiday season, for many reasons.

Because the holidays seem to be such challenging and sometimes transitional periods in our lives, this month I decided to have a look at what I think are the “Top 5 Blues” that affect so many people during the holidays, along with why we get them, and how to turn them around into Joy. Here are the top 5 that came to mind:

• Holiday Blues Number 1: Seasonal Affective Disorder (”SAD”) in today’s issue
• Holiday Blues Number 2: Seasonal Illnesses (coming Wed 9 December)
• Holiday Blues Number 3: Family “Dramas” (coming Sun 27 December)
• Holiday Blues Number 4: Stress over Money (coming Mon 28 December)
• Holiday Blues Number 5: Feelings of Isolation (coming Thus 31December

Over the next 12 days, I’ll be examining each of these “blue areas”, give you some tips from other great thinkers, and offer a few of my own suggestions for turning the winter “blues” into cheery multi-coloured mind-body-spirit holiday sparkles. Today, I’ll be talking about SAD– Seasonal Affective Disorder. The findings might surprise you!

Beating Holiday Blues Number 1: Seasonal Affective Disorder (”SAD”).
SAD is a condition that affects some people during the winter months causing them to feel a bit blue, low in energy, or basically “down in the dumps.” But what causes it? Continue Reading…

Serenity – holding the entire World within our arms

Many thanks to Abbe Armband Henkel, an old High School friend of mine and Facebook fan, for selecting the magic number 61 for last week’s meditation. This meditation was read on the air on “Lynn Serafinn’s Garden of the Soul Radio Show” on Wed 4 Nov 2009. If you would like to help me write my upcoming book “The Companion Guide to the Garden of the Soul” and possibly have your name listed in the acknowledgements of the book, and announced on my weekly radio broadcast, just select a number from 1-80 and post it in the comments below.

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Meditation 61: Serernity
from “Lessons from the Lily: the Principle of Being”

Serenity is that state of Being in which we feel most balanced and connected to Self. When we are serene, the ups and downs of life do not disturb the flow of our lives. Some people believe Serenity to be that quality of not being upset by loss or sadness, but actually it is equally true that the serene person is also not imbalanced by what appears to be gain or happiness. When we are full of Serenity, we become able to hold the entire World within our arms, carry everything with equal strength and inner satisfaction. And when we are able to carry all there is, without a view to whether it is positive or negative, we become both inwardly quiet, and outwardly invincible…

Continue Reading…

Love – The Uncensored Expression of Who You Really Are

Many thanks to Belma Palacios Gonzales, from the Garden of the Soul Fan Page on Facebook,  for selecting the magic number 4 for last week’s meditation. This meditation was read on the air on “Lynn Serafinn’s Garden of the Soul Radio Show” on  Wed 21 Oct 2009. If you would like to help me write my upcoming book “The Companion Guide to the Garden of the Soul” and possibly have your name listed in the acknowledgements of the book, and announced on my weekly radio broadcast, just select a number from 1-80 and post it in the comments below.

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Meditation 4: Love
from “Lessons from the Rose: the Principle of Giving”

Love is the energy that enables us to connect to Self, other and the Universe. Like any energy, Love can propel both motion and action. And also like any energy, it creates heat. It is this heat of Love that attracts us; it is also what generates Life itself. But heat and energy alone do not create Love. For energy to be Love, it must be free-flowing, easy and without force. Consider this: when we release the energy of a deposit of oil and natural gas from the depths of the Earth, it results in a massive quantity heat and of energy. But because these deposits are under so much natural pressure, the process requires an enormous amount of force. The force results in an explosion of pressure so great, that it can easily go out of control and even become dangerous.

Many of us have experienced so-called “love” in much the same way. We might believe we have fallen in love with someone or some idea. But we soon find the object of our love to be difficult to capture, and we resort to some sort of force to acquire it by all means. That force could be as simple as silently wishing for the object of our affections to be something other than it is by nature. Just like the oil well that requires great pressure to release its energy in such an unnatural way, when we similarly try to force Love to come unnaturally, our relationships and personal endeavours can become volatile and even heartbreaking. Thus, the key to mastering the energy of Love is to understanding that it must, at all times, flow freely and unconditionally from the heat of one’s heart. And the secret to knowing how to allow love to flow unconditionally is this—that Love has nothing whatsoever to do with the object of your affections; it only has to do with you. Continue Reading…

Unblocking Our Pathways to Happiness

Any of you who have either worked with me or read my book The Garden of the Soul know that I believe every human being is a born hero. However, all too few of us step into our hero’s calling. For some of us, it is simply because we don’t understand the call when we hear it. But for many others it is because we resist the call we are hearing. And when we continually resist our own call, we cannot feel truly fulfilled in life. We get a sense that our lives are put “on hold” as we wait for the “some day” when our “big break” will arrive that will turn our lives around.

But all too often, “some day” and the “big break” don’t come. This isn’t because we are unlucky or have “bad karma.” It’s because we are looking in the wrong direction to find the solutions to our lack of fulfilment. After going through my own transformations in life, teaching thousands of students over the years, working with hundreds of coaching clients and interviewing dozens of fascinating people on my radio show, I have learned one thing: Continue Reading…

Poise as a Quality of the Divine

Many thanks to Evelyn Thomas of Lizard Life Coaching who selected the number 27 for this week’s meditation. If you would like to help me write my upcoming book “The Companion Guide to the Garden of the Soul” and possibly have your name listed in the acknowledgements of the book, and announced on my weekly radio broadcast, just select a number from 1-80 and post it in the comment thread below.

Meditation 27:  Poise
from “Lessons from the Iris: the Principle of Receiving”

Poise is a state of being in which you move freely and effortlessly within your own energy.

We tend to think of Poise as a word used to describe the quality of someone who is physically graceful and calm. Many of us also believe Poise to be the ability to control our emotional expression. While these external symptoms might sometimes be indicators of Poise, there are not the key elements. In fact, they might even been a shield that is covering up a lack of genuine Poise. How many of us refrain from expressing our emotions because we have told ourselves that it is the more “poised” thing to do. But if such emotional restraint is coming from the desire to appear mature, professional or in control, it is unlikely to be genuine Poise. You can tell the difference between the two, because true Poise results in a feeling of ease, satisfaction and freedom, while false Poise results in a feeling of being stuck, frustrated or stifled.

Poise, therefore, is not the absence of emotions, but the strength of their authenticity. We can be poised even when our emotions appear to be very powerful. Some of the most poised people in history are those who have wielded their genuine anger, grief or passion with creativity, honesty and fearlessness. When we are poised, we are most able to express all the colours of our Heart and Soul. Continue Reading…