Vrinda Pendred

When Vrinda Pendred (nee Barker) was diagnosed with Tourette Syndrome at age 7, the doctor failed to notice she had Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) as well, despite OCD symptoms being a huge part of why her parents had brought her to the doctor in the first place. Even when she was finally diagnosed with OCD at almost 14, Vrinda had no comprehension of how complex and wide-ranging the disorder was, even within herself. Only as an adult did she finally start to understand just how deeply OCD affected her life, mentally, physically, emotionally and socially.

Vrinda’s story is not at all unique. In fact, if there is anything rare about it, it’s that she was diagnosed as young as age 13. Some people don’t discover there’s a name for their intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviour until mid-life. Others are never diagnosed throughout their entire lives, their ‘quirkiness’ remaining a mystery both to themselves and to the people in their lives. We can only imagine the suffering they’ve experienced, struggling through homelife, school and work, feeling misunderstood by teachers, parents, friends and colleagues.

And it’s not just the people who have OCD who are suffering. Think of the frustration and heartache felt by millions of teachers and parents around the world, who watch their students or children struggling with OCD (often undiagnosed), but cannot understand what is happening because these children are too young to express what is going on inside their heads. The sense of helplessness, and even guilt, can be enormous, as they simply do not know what to do to help an OCD child, and are at a total loss as to how to manage or respond to the unusual behaviour and destructive anxieties.

And what is most poignant is the thought that all of this could be avoided – and even treated – if there were more education about the many facets that make up OCD.

And that is what Vrinda Pendred has set out to do. Now 27 years old, and a mother herself, she has merged her two most passionate callings in life: 1) writing and 2) educating the world about neurological conditions, such as OCD. Vrinda has created a unique publishing company called Conditional Publications, whose primary aim is to help push forward this education, by devoting its catalogue to publishing the works of writers with neurological conditions, thus giving a voice to the real experts on these mysterious disorders.

Check Mates - out on Tues May 11th

Their first book, Check Mates: A Collection of Fiction, Poetry and Artwork about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, by People with OCD, is coming to Amazon TOMORROW Tuesday, May 11^th

Put together by 20 writers and artists from around the world, all who have OCD, Check Mates showcases a range of emotions, from love to hate, joy to rage, fear and sorrow to hope and optimism. There’s even a little bit of humour. What it doesn’t do is shy away from the truth. Every angle is covered, no matter how painful, which makes for a startling and moving read.

If you are wondering why I am so empassioned by Vrinda’s story it’s this: Vrinda is my own daughter, and I personally know what she has gone through to reach this remarkable achievment. I also know what I, as a mother, have felt watching her grow up. And lastly, my father had undiagnosed OCD, and it is only through Vrinda that I have come to understand much of the pain and confusion from my childhood.

On this Day-After-Mothers’-Day, I could not be more proud of my daughter than I feel today.

Whether you’re a parent or teacher of a child dealing with OCD, a therapist or coach of OCD clients, or you have OCD yourself, everyone will find something in this book that speaks to them.

And if you don’t think you know anyone with OCD, have a look around. I think you’ll be surprised (if not shocked) at how many people have it, but are hiding in silence and isolation. This book will open up your eyes, your mind and your heart, and will bring a long overdue healing for many.

And, true to her principles, Vrinda will be donating a portion of the proceeds from the sale of every copy of Check Mates to OCD charities, to encourage research and treatment for the condition.

Check Mates: A Collection of Fiction, Poetry and Artwork about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, by People with OCD is coming to Amazon TOMORROW Tuesday May 11^th. To show my support of this inspirational new book, I am giving away my mini-eCourse “Making Friends with the Monsters Under Your Bed” to everyone who buys Check Mates on the day of the launch.

AND… In addition to my gift, there are over 30 other wonderful gifts being offered by mind-body-spirit teachers, authors, coaches and healers from around the planet when you purchase the book on May 11^th.

To find out how you can buy this book on May 11^th
and receive over 30 other gifts, just click HERE

Or copy and paste this link in your browser:
http://conditionalpublications.com/pages/check-mates-launch.html

I hope you will join me in celebrating the launch of this unique book, Check Mates, the first ever collection of fiction, poetry and artwork about OCD.

Illustration from the book 'Check Mates'

OCD – Understanding, Not Just Awareness

It might sound like a surprising thing to say, but Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder affects pretty much everyone. Maybe you have it yourself. Or perhaps your partner has it, or your sibling, or an old childhood friend, or maybe your next-door neighbour. You might not even be aware of it, but the chances are high that you know someone who is obsessive-compulsive.

In recent years, OCD has become more publicly discussed, with celebrities coming forward and admitting they are afflicted by the condition. Yet when David Beckham went public with his diagnosis, much of the world made jokes and laughed. There was little consideration for his lifelong struggle with his own mind, or the difficulties it might pose for his family. There was even less acknowledgment that most people are at least a little obsessive-compulsive themselves.

Despite the growing awareness of such conditions, stereotypes persist…and an inspiring (and inspired) group of writers have boldly decided to do something about that. Together, they have compiled a groundbreaking new book Check Mates: A Collection of Fiction, Poetry and Artwork about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, by People with OCD.

Check Mates, edited by Vrinda Pendred, is the first ever collection of fiction, poetry and artwork about OCD, by people with OCD – the real experts on the subject. It also marks the launch of Conditional Publications, the only dedicated publishing house for writers with any kind of neurological condition.

Divided between ‘Realism’ and the ‘Beyond’, this book drives the absurdity and horror of OCD straight home. It has been put together by writers and artists from around the world, and showcases a wide range of emotions, from love to hate, joy to rage, fear and sorrow to hope and optimism. There’s even a little bit of humour! I think everyone will find something to relate to.

What it doesn’t do is shy away from the truth. Every angle is covered, no matter how painful, which makes for a startling and moving read.

If you have OCD, you’re going to find yourself in this book and realise you’re definitely not alone. If you don’t have OCD…you’re probably going to find a little of yourself anyway, because that’s what this book does: it forces us to look at our own neuroses. I think this book is set to crack wide open a few stereotypes that have been flying around for far too long.

And what makes this book even more special, is that a portion of the proceeds from the sale of every single copy of Check Mates will be donated to OCD charities.

Check Mates: A Collection of Fiction, Poetry and Artwork about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, by People with OCD is coming to Amazon on 11 May 2010. To show my support of this inspirational new book,  to everyone who buys Check Mates on the day of the launch, I am giving away a FREE copy the “Making Friends With the Monsters Under Your Bed” mini-course to help anyone overcome anxieties, fears, insecurities and negative self-talk, whether OR not you have OCD.

AND… In addition to my gift, there are over 30 other wonderful gifts being offered by mind-body-spirit teachers, authors, coaches and healers from around the planet when you purchase Check Mates: A Collection of Fiction, Poetry and Artwork about Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, by People with OCD on May 11^th.

AND … Vrinda Pendred, editor and co-author of Check Mates, and a genuine artist of surreal fiction, is giving away an EXTRA special gift of her own: ‘The Passenger’, an unpublished short story about Tourette Syndrome. And yes, Vrinda herself has Tourette Syndrome, OCD and other neurological conditions.

AND… would it be just TOO unprofessional of me to mention that the lovely and talented Vrinda happens to be my very own daughter? I am more than just a little bit proud of what she is doing, and I have to say this book is absolutely gripping. Very impactful, it touches me on just so many levels.

To find out how you can buy this book on May 11^th, claim your free copy of ‘The Passenger’, and receive over 30 other gifts, just click HERE

Or copy and paste this link in your browser:

http://conditionalpublications.com/pages/check-mates-launch.html

I hope you will join me in celebrating the launch of this unique book, Check Mates, the first ever collection of fiction, poetry and artwork about OCD.

Be sure to sign up for a “launch reminder”, and then mark your diary for May 11^th!

But all too often, “some day” and the “big break” don’t come. This isn’t because we are unlucky or have “bad karma.” It’s because we are looking in the wrong direction to find the solutions to our lack of fulfilment. After going through my own transformations in life, teaching thousands of students over the years, working with hundreds of coaching clients and interviewing dozens of fascinating people on my radio show, I have learned one thing: the circumstances of our lives cannot be blamed (or at least not 100%) for our unhappiness. What are some of the worst circumstances you can imagine? Try to imagine being a 6-year-old boy and being exiled with no possessions and left to starve to death in the Siberian wasteland. Or how about being a teenage girl whose father murders her own mother in cold blood, marries her mother’s sister, and is then acquitted by the court? Can you imagine living with such things? Can you imagine surviving them to such a point where you felt so full of joy that you have made it your life’s work to spread joy to others? But it’s true. I have met these people,* and so many others, in my work. And happiness, I have found, is 100% a matter of allowing it to happen. But if we are blocking the pipeline to our own happiness, it will never flow.

There are many ways we block this pipeline to happiness. One is the unconscious way we talk about ourselves. Most of us pay little attention to the subtle ways we verbally undermine ourselves, whether in our heads or aloud, on an almost continual basis. Another way we get in our own way are all the “old stories” we tell about ourselves, such as “That’s just the way I am” or “I’m really bad with x, y, z.” A third way we block our own happiness is the almost autonomic way we tend to slip into “roles” in different circumstances. We might unthinkingly adopt a powerless, voiceless or even aggressive role in certain family, social or professional scenarios, for example. Both we and others begin to mistake these roles for ourselves, and we end up feeling drained and misunderstood. The end result of all these “monsters” is that we become disconnected to both our real emotions and from our bodily awareness. We can even become weakened or ill on a physical level and we certainly become desensitized to the “hero’s call” that is always around us. When we reach this level of disconnection, we can become resigned to our “lot” life, and lose faith that we can ever truly be happy.

But as I said, I passionately believe that every human being is a hero, and all of these things are part of the hero’s journey—even the struggle to come back to the Self. Every hero is a hero because he or she has faced the “monster” no one else had the courage to face. All the old stories, all the roles, all the self-talk, all the feelings of fear, anger, blame and loss—these are the monsters. And when we face them and come out the other side with the wisdom that only a true hero knows, we find the elixir that makes our lives, and the lives of those around us, truly magical.

This month at the Bedford and West Herts Wellness Circle I will be doing a mini-workshop about the hero’s journey, so you can get a tiny glimpse into where you are on the path. And if you’d like to step fully into that journey, be sure to sign up for the “Transformation Trilogy” that is starting THIS Saturday and Sunday (17/18 Oct) in Bedford. The Trilogy is a set of three weekend workshops spread over three months. You do NOT have to attend all three weekends, as they are completely separate courses, but you see the progression from course to course if you do. This weekend, we’ll be “Making Friends with the Monsters Under Your Bed” where we will be looking at all the things I have spoken about in this article, so that you will be REALLY ready to step into your inner hero in Workshop 2, “Becoming the Hero of Your Own Life”, in November.

NOTE:  We urgently need 5 more people to sign up for this weekend’s “Monsters” to give the course “buzz”. PLEASE book with me via telephone no later than 8pm Wednesday 14 May. Click HERE to read all information AND to book your place.

* The 6-year-old boy is author Andrew Bienkowski, and the teenage girl is actress Brenda Adelman, both extraordinary people I interviewed on my radio show. Click links above to listen to those great past shows.