If you’re looking to reclaim your inner space this month, Karen’s luscious Walkingspirit Retreat runs June 26th to July 3rd in Tuscany, Italy. See full details at the end of this article to find out how to book and receive a discount as one of Lynn’s subscribers.

When Karen Maycey (pictured above) changed careers to become a coach in 2005, she was asked a simple question: “What is your dream?” Karen replied quickly, saying, “My dream is to run a retreat in the mountains!”

She had first had this dream when she was working as a tour guide in the Austrian Alps. During that period of her life, Karen had a successful and exciting career as a guide for long haul and adventure holidays. She had taken groups to the Great Wall of China, through the US National Parks, and countless times through New Zealand and Australia. And throughout those times, she kept dreaming of creating her own retreat-not one that was defined by the tour companies that hired her-which would incorporate yoga, walking, being in inspirational surroundings in the mountains (her favourite place) and good quality home-cooked food.

But the fact she was so successful at her job actually proved to be a distraction to Karen, and over time this dream got somewhat forgotten.

But when her coaching trainers asked the question, “What is your dream?”, the dream reappeared. And this time, she knew her mountain retreat would also include coaching.

But while the picture of the dream became clearer in Karen’s mind, life took over, and once again the dream got pushed into the background of her life. She says, “The dream sort of ‘hung around’ but it was semi-forgotten.”

In 2006, Karen she met a man named Verran, who was at that time a marketing director of private company. Soon, the two became a couple. Like Karen, Verran loved the mountains and the great outdoors, but his job offered little opportunity to live his passion. He had a dream to start a new company that incorporated his love for the outdoors and his work with businesses. Karen encouraged and supported him to follow his heart, and Verran resigned from his job. He soon started a company called “Outside Insights”, where he works as a walking guide taking businesses into the outdoors for team building, problem solving and personal growth. But Karen’s own dream was still not yet manifesting,

Then, April 2007 she took a course called Awakened Wisdom with Patrick Ryan where one of the tasks was to create a “mandala” envisioning her dreams for the future and how she wanted to “be” in the world. Over and over again, the theme of retreats kept popping up, along with being open-hearted, tapping into cosmic love, being a shining star, and being a catalyst for change and an inspiration. She was inspired by the words of Marianne Williamson that spoke of allowing one’s light to shine, and that it didn’t serve anyone for her to hide away. In making this mandala, Karen knew it was time to start being that shining star.

Astonishingly, within weeks of coming to that realisation, she was called by a company called “The Big Stretch” for an interview, and was subsequently hired. “The Big Stretch” was very close to her dream, as every gave her the opportunity to lead personal development courses for small groups that involved a “full on” week of coaching and walking in mountains of Spain. She felt this new job “semi-satisfied” her dream, but the bigger dream was still on the back burner. But all of it was slowly building up to the experience she truly wanted to create, and helped to give her the confidence she could do it.

But then, things changed.

In May 2008, Karen noticed a lump in her left breast. Shortly thereafter she went for an operation and her first diagnosis. At age 37, Karen had grade-2 breast cancer.
Karen was filled with shock and disbelief. How could she have cancer? She had always been so healthy and health conscious. She was young, fit, active, sporty and spent a lot of time outdoors. How could this happen?

But after the initial shock, she got down to dealing with the situation. After all, this was a matter of life and death. But Karen soon realised it was not so simple. She realised that deciding upon a treatment regime had to be something that matched her philosophy in life. Trusting her intuition, and frequently needing to hold true to her convictions in the face of advice she was receiving from her NHS doctors, Karen decided not to do chemotherapy, and embarked on a naturopathic route to healing. She felt her healing could only really happen if she worked in a way she herself believed.

Karen says, “I think what matters is that you believe in the choices you are making.”

She spent more than a year on an intense 5-hour a day regime that included detox and supplements, costing her thousands of pounds.

And all through the process, she kept saying to herself, “When I get better, I’ll do this or I’ll do that” But while her treatments seemed to be working well, and she began to look more healthy and vibrant than she did before the cancer, whenever her test results came back from the lab, the doctors never said, “Your cancer is gone forever.” Instead, they would always say, there is more work to do. It seemed like everything in her life was put “on hold” while she focussed on her cancer.

But then, over the Christmas holiday in 2009, things changed again.

She and Verran were on holiday on the La Vacchio farm in a valley in northern Italy. They spent many hours talking together about the experience of the past year and their vision for the future. Looking at the beautiful surroundings, Karen felt a shift within her. Suddenly, she realised how long she had been delaying her dream, year after year. But now she saw it was time to start living in the now. If she kept using other things as excuses to delay her dreams, they might never come true. And if she simply put her dreams on hold while she had cancer, she might even die before she had had the chance to live life fully.

In one instant, she shifted from a ‘When I get better then I’ll do…” attitude, to a ‘Go for it!’ attitude. It was time to do her retreat–NOW.

And in the serendipitous fashion of the Universe, no sooner had she made this shift, the owners of the farm asked her and Verran if they would be interested in running a retreat on their farm! So all of a sudden they had their venue sorted, without any effort.
Karen’s entire life has changed since then. She lives life fully and makes the most of every moment. She didn’t do this last year when she was focussing on her illness. There’s no more waiting for tomorrow, no matter what the situation might be–even when you have cancer.

So now, Karen wants to share her dream with the world. She says, “I’m really looking forward to showing others that self–indulgence–this lovely thing-is actually a gift for the sake of their happiness and health. I want people to have a gorgeous time reconnecting with nature and themselves, chilling out, and recharging their batteries.”

“What I want people to gain from the retreat is to know they matter–that they are important–and that they can choose their attitude in every moment. The retreat is an opportunity to kick-start loving life and to shift from deferring one’s dreams to being in now. The yoga, coaching, walking, wonderful food and beautiful surroundings will all bring that. It’s all about being in the present and going for what you want.”

“In a way, that’s the secret to life,” she adds.

WALKINGSPIRIT RETREAT
Date: June 26-July 3, 2010 (7 days)
Place: La Vacchio Retreat (in valley north of Luca, Tuscany, Italy
Retreat Leaders: Karen Maycey (coaching), Verran Townsend (walking guide), Lisa Jones (yoga)
Agenda: Coaching, Yoga, Walking, organic food, relaxing and fun!
There will be group coaching every day 1-2 hours, and the opportunity to have one 1-to-1 session of either coaching or yoga during the week.
Cost: £995 (including accommodation and food)
You can get £25 off to cost of the retreat if you say  “Lynn sent me” when you book!

To get your discount call 0161 928 8179 (UK)
or email karen at: Karen@walkingspirit.co.uk

There is no deadline to book, BUT there are only a few spaces left.

More information:
Web: http://walkingspirit.co.uk
Blog: http://wallkspirit.wordpress.com
Fan page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Walkingspirit/123408144354924
Retreat Venue: http://lavacchio.com

About Lynn Serafinn

Lynn Serafinn is a transformation coach, book promotion coach, radio host and bestselling author of the book The Garden of the Soul: lessons from four flowers that unearth the Self. She also works as a campaign manager for mind-body-spirit authors and has produced two #1-selling book campaigns, and another #2-selling campaign, in just the past 4 months. She is also the creator of Spirit Authors to offer training, coaching, business-building and inspiration for mind-body-spirit authors, whether established or aspiring. She’s also in Round 2 of the Next Top Spiritual Author contest! To check out Lynn’s video entry, brand new book proposal and read 80 pages from her book The Garden of the Soul, go to http://www.NextTopAuthor.com/?aid=2016. A free gift awaits you when you cast your vote.

That’s what I imagine it will feel like to the lucky person who wins a wonderful contest being offered by coach Patrick Ryan, author of the upcoming book Awakened Wisdom: a Guide to Reclaiming Your Brilliance, which is coming to Amazon on Tuesday April 20, 2010.

As part of the celebration of the launch of the book, Patrick is giving away a $3000 “Awakened Wisdom Experience” (AWE) to one person. The AWE-some Grand Prize includes 4 private 1-to-1 personal coaching sessions with Patrick, a personally signed copy of the book Awakened Wisdom AND 2 free VIP passes to attend his 3-day Awakened Wisdom Workshop anywhere in the world.

Patrick is a world renowned executive coach, leadership trainer and spiritual teacher. For more than three decades, he has studied and practiced the way of an awakened life with spiritual masters and indigenous teachers all over the planet, and even served as a Buddhist monk in a monastery in Burma. His depth of spiritual knowledge, combined with his natural, down-to-earth personality, make him both a powerful and accessible coach and teacher.

Anyone who receives this exceptional prize should ready for a complete “inner beauty” makeover. And remember: there are TWO free passes to the Awakened Wisdom workshop, which means you can share this gift with a friend or loved one.

To enter the AWE contest, you only need to answer one question:

“What will you give the world when you reclaim your brilliance?”

A great question, don’t you think?

To enter, you must submit your answer to this question BEFORE April 9^th. To get started, go to: http://www.awakenedwisdom.com/Public/Amazon/booklaunch/index.cfm

To qualify, you will be asked to sign up for a “launch reminder” for Patrick’s book, Awakened Wisdom first. As soon as you’ve done that, you’ll be taken to a page with a link to the contest entry page.

A list of semi-finalists will be announced on April 12^th. The Grand Prize winner will be decided by public vote (so be sure to get your friends and family on board to support you!).

And…

Even if you don’t want to enter the contest, do please check out Patrick’s book Awakened Wisdom: A Guide to Reclaiming Your Brilliance on that same page. If you scroll down on that page, you’ll see that dozens of authors, coaches, entrepreneurs and spiritual teachers have come together to celebrate the launch of this profound and practical book, by giving away over 40 very special gifts to anyone who buys the book on April 20. And I am one of them!

To everyone who buys Patrick’s book, I will be giving away FOUR free audio meditations from my Garden of the Soul Workshop. These are very special meditations I have never offered before anywhere, unless you happen to have taken my workshop. I hope you’ll like them.

Best of luck to all of you who enter the contest. Please keep me posted if you win, so I can announce it in my upcoming newsletter. I’d also love to hear your answers to this great question!

Warm wishes,
Lynn Serafinn

My Twitter asteroids:
http://twitter.com/LynnSerafinn
http://twitter.com/SpiritAuthors

My Facebook galaxies:
http://facebook.com/LynnSerafinn
http://facebook.com/VoteLynnSerafinnNextTopSpiritualAuthor
http://facebook.com/SpiritAuthors
http://facebook.com/gardenofthesoul

To honour the coming of the new decade, I decided to set some intentions. To keep me focussed and balanced, I decided to use the four principles of “Give, Receive, Become and Be” from my book The Garden of the Soul as a foundation for those intentions. I’d like to share them with you here.

My intention for the Principle of Giving

I have learned that true “Giving” means to listen deeply to people’s hearts and give them what they truly want, rather than imposing what my ego tells me what I think they need. This decade, I make the intention to give to everyone I meet, from my heart to theirs.

My intention for the Principle of Receiving

I have learned that true “Receiving” means to open my eyes and ears to become aware of the boundless gifts being sent to me at every moment of my life. This decade, I make the intention to allow myself to receive, with wonder, joy and gratitude, all the Universe offers me.

My intention for the Principle of Becoming

I have learned that we cannot “Become” or grow unless we let go of old ways of thinking that do not serve us and keep us stuck in a treadmill. This decade, I make the intention to let go of old stories I have about myself and the world, and to become extraordinary in ways I had never before imagined I could.

My intention for the Principle of Being

I have learned that “Being” means to know and love the Self regardless of the multitude of labels we use to describe ourselves, and to be aware of who we are no matter what challenges surround us. This decade, I make the intention to be me, and only me, and to see you as only you.

Thank you for allowing me to share my intentions with you. I had an ulterior motive for doing so. You see, I know that the true power of intentions comes when you share them with others. And I really, really want to be able to be mindful of these intentions, because I know they sometimes might not be so easy to remember. The fact that you have heard them means there is more power behind them, so thank you for reading.

Try it out for yourself. Make your intentions for the new decade, and then share them with special and supportive people in your life. Then see how much this action helps you to be mindful of your promises to yourself. And what’s even more interesting is that we don’t necessarily have to share our intentions with other people (although it’s always good to, because they can hold us accountable). If you prefer, you can go out into Nature and shout your intentions to the moon, the trees, the birds, the ocean or whatever has meaning and energy for you. Or, if you are the kind of person who likes to pray or meditate, state your intentions to Spirit, in whatever form is true for you. No matter how you state your intentions, when others bear witness to our sincere expression of them, it’s as if the Universe has etched our words into our cosmic diaries, and holds us firmly on our true course in life.

And of course, you are MOST welcome to share your intentions with me below in the comments! I’d love to be your “intention buddy.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Is one of your intentions in 2010 to start writing a spirit-based book? Maybe you’ve already written it and you are ready to find out how to publish and promote your book. Or maybe, you’ve just started your writing journey by keeping a diary, a blog or other journal of your thoughts, feelings or creative ideas. No matter where you are in your writing journey, I’d like to invite you to visit Spirit Authors, my brand new Virtual Coaching and Learning Experience just for mind-body-spirit writers.

We are having a fantastic Spirit Authors Grand Opening Webinar Week from Monday 22 February through Friday 26 February, where you can hear (for fr*ee) over a dozen top mind-body-spirit industry professionals, from authors, to publishers, to editors, to marketers and more, all talking about spirit-based books, from writing to publishing to promotion. You’ll also find out how you can join the new Spirit Authors membership site, bringing you bespoke courses, business resources, and great opportunities for both personal and professional networking, all aimed at writers in the mind-body-spirit genre.

To make sure you don’t miss our Grand Opening, be sure to come over to www.spiritauthors.com and sign up for our news updates, so you can receive a VIP invitation to this very special Grand Opening Webinar Week.

5 Easy Ways to Beat the Blues and Feel Joyous this Holiday Season-  Part 4 of 5
by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

Well, as we move into the last week of the holiday season, we move into the penultimate article in our series of tips to help you beat the blues over the holidays:

1. Holiday Blues Number 1: Seasonal Affective Disorder (“SAD”) posted 6 December
2. Holiday Blues Number 2: Seasonal Illnessess, posted 10 Dec
3. Holiday Blues Number 3: Family “Dramas” (posted 27 Dec)
   
4. Holiday Blues Number 4: Stress over Money in today’s post
5. Holiday Blues Number 5: Feelings of Isolation (coming Thursday 31 December)

TIP: If you want to receive all 5 articles, be sure to subscribe to this blog in the box on the right hand side of your screen.

Let’s face it. Sometimes we spend money during the holidays as if we had an unlimited supply of cash. But then, the bills start to arrive. And while we might have felt bright, bubbly and festive when we did our holiday shopping, when we begin to assess the financial “damages”, our euphoria can rapidly turn into stress, and even guilt, making it impossible for us to feel the joy of the season.

I’m pretty sure just about all of us have experienced such “buyer’s regret” at one time or another in our lives when we have purchased something and thought twice about it after the fact. At other times of the year, if we bought something and had regrets about it afterwards, we could usually return it if we wished. But with holiday spending, this isn’t so easy, as most of our spending is on gifts for others, or on holiday consumables like food, drink and entertainment. We cannot return these items and get our money back.

So, how can we relieve ourselves from this stress and guilt?

It would be all too easy to say, “Just don’t spend as much next year.” Equally, it would be all too easy to say, “Don’t worry about it. It’s only money. You can’t take it with you, so spend it when you’ve got it.”

But the problem is, it doesn’t work like that. To say, “Just don’t spend as much” is about as effective as telling a smoker or a drinker, “Just don’t smoke/drink as much.” The truth is we are probably spending for reasons ever so subtle, we might not even be aware of them. And unless we understand our true motivation for matters to do with money, no amount of “Why don’t you just do this or that” will change our habits. Money is not actually the cause of our stress and guilt. It is how we think about ourselves in relation to money that is the culprit.

In this article, I will look at three common ways our relationship with money can cause stress in many people, especially during the holidays:

1. Misunderstanding the true nature of money
2. Using money as a substitute for authentic expression
3. Using money as a distorted measurement of our worth

What money is and what it is not
Our culture of consumerism seems to induce the feeling that we are dependent upon money, just the same way an addict feels dependent upon a particular substance. But the truth is we are not dependent upon money; we have only given our power away to it and come to believe we are.

Money is actually a convenience we human beings have created to enable us to place a quantifiable value upon things, so we can easily trade for whatever we want and need to make our lives fuller and happier. Our monetary system has helped us move from needing to determine an equivalent value for every single item or service we might wish to exchange with each other. It also made life a heck of a lot more practical and enabled us to create the modern world in which we currently live. For instance, I seriously doubt I would be sitting writing this article if, every day, I had to lug around a bucket of milk with me every time I wanted to get a loaf of bread, or whatever I happened to need. I’d have no time for self-development or writing articles!

Seen from this perspective, we can realise that money is actually a creation, a tool and a convenience we humans invented to make our lives easier and to give us more time to grow at a level of consciousness, rather than simply focus on survival all the time. I would go so far as to say that money is a “divinely inspired” creation. How ironic it is, therefore, that so many of us get into a panic and regress to a sub-human “survival mode” when it comes to thinking about money. Our fears and anxieties prevent us from seeing the divine nature of money. Some are so fearful and so blinded to the divine nature of money that they try to use money to gain power over others, either physically or psychologically, thus creating more stress, fear and anxiety in the world (for the most part, all those annoying “cold calls” you get from call centres are dependent upon your anxieties around money, and their entire ethos is built upon a distorted view of what money is).

But when we can see the divine nature of money, we are able to develop a genuinely healthy relationship with it. We come to understand that it can help us create a world in which we have time to explore the Self and find fulfilment at the Soul level, in whatever form that might mean to us. If we relate to it for any other reason (i.e., “I need money to pay my bills,” etc.) we are apt to feel inferior to and resentful towards it, and will tend to push it away from us, making our feelings of lack even greater.

So take a deep breath and start to see money from this perspective: as a wonderful creation whose sole purpose is to bring freedom and enlightenment to all human beings (not just the so-called “rich”). If we are feeling imprisoned by money, rather than free, it does not mean we need more money; it means we have not yet fully understood our authentic relationship with it.

How our perspective determines our relationship with money

Just as in our relationships with other people, it is important to cultivate a healthy relationship with money. If we view it as the evil Task Master, it will treat us as if it were one. If we view money with the spirit of creativity and choice, it changes our relationship entirely. Here’s an example: Let’s say I am walking down the High Street with £20 in my pocket and I unexpectedly see something I have been looking for that normally costs £20 but is on sale today only for £10. It’s a great bargain, but I know I have to go grocery shopping, and I usually spend £20 on food. I have a choice in how I react to it:

• I could tell myself, “I can’t afford that. I don’t have enough money,” and feel disempowered and limited.
• I could tell myself, “I’ll buy it and I’ll just have to live on canned soup and stale bread,” and feel impoverished, lacking and guilty.
• I could tell myself, “I’ll put it on a credit card. What difference will an extra £10 make?” and delude myself that I am in control, making my dependency problem even worse.
• I could tell myself, “I want to spend my money on food today, and I’ll come back next week for that,” and feel more empowered and at choice.
• I could tell myself, “I’ve really wanted that a long time, so I’ll buy that today, and when I do my grocery shopping, I’ll save money by leaving out all the packaged meals and treats, and stock up on my favourite fresh fruit and vegetables instead. I’ll even make the fruit and veg taste especially delicious by looking up some new recipes for them on the Internet,” and not only feel at choice, but feel I have created an exciting solution for myself.

The key to remember is that the more we are able to see money as a creative tool for our own fulfilment, rather than something that is both limited and limiting in our lives, the more we are able to develop a healthy relationship with it and free ourselves from stress. In other words, when we view money as a free-flowing energy that is meant to flow into us and through us from the world, we can then begin to allow it to come into our lives. I discuss the attribute of “Allowing” in the section called “The Principle of Receiving” in my book The Garden of the Soul. In order for things to flow into us, we must allow them to enter. Money is no different. If we view money as something that has control over us, we will block the barriers to it coming into our lives, and continue the vicious cycle of disconnection, lack, and helplessness.

Using money as a substitute for authentic expression
Just as it is important to understand our relationship with money, it is equally important to understand the reasons why we spend money, especially during the holiday season. Are we spending for the “wrong” reasons? For instance, are we using spending as a means to express our love? Buying gifts to express love is fine, but in some cases, spending becomes a substitute for actual expression of love. I have known many people in my life who found it difficult to express love outwardly, so they would buy gifts as a way to say what they felt they could not say with words or other actions. The result was that they would feel good when they were shopping for the gifts, but afterwards, their mood would dip seriously low.

I’ve observed several reasons why people who spend for the wrong reasons experience this mood swing. First, they feel as though they are unappreciated or misunderstood by the person(s) for whom they bought the gifts. This is because, whether consciously or not, they had replaced their ability to express their inner feelings with external gifts. But no gift can ever adequately express our feelings. And while the recipient of the gift might feel truly grateful, the gift can never say what the gift giver is truly feeling inside. In other words, gifts can only ever be an enhancement, not a replacement, of our emotional expression. If we use them to express what we feel incapable of expressing, we are likely to experience the “dip”. We might even feel that our feelings are not being reciprocated by the other person, but when our emotions are not clearly expressed, we are less likely to get the kind of response we are seeking.

The flow of natural self-expression is an attribute of “The Principle of Giving” in my book The Garden of the Soul. The key to understanding “Giving” is in understanding where it originates. In order to learn how to give authentically, we must first be able to tap into the resources of our own inner Self. All true giving starts there. If we use gift buying to avoid the flow of energy from our inner self into the outer world, we will always feel misunderstood, frustrated and “poor”.

If you are experiencing this kind of “dip” after you have completed you holiday spending, I encourage you to explore the enquiries:

1. What I am trying to say through my spending?
2. What other means can I use to express myself more clearly and openly?
3. What holds me back from being clear and open?

Money as a distorted measurement of our own worth
If you finally want to unlock the straight-jacket in which you have put yourself over money, it is vital that you take a good, honest look at how much of your opinion of yourself is entangled with your financial wherewithal. Ask yourself, “How much of my self-worth do I determine according to how much money I have?” You might not be completely conscious of the fact that you are doing this. But if you have fleeting thoughts that your house, job, clothes, car or other possessions are not good enough compared to other peoples’, or that you “should” have better things just because it feels like the rest of the world has more than you do (as opposed to wanting things because they are a part of your inner-most dreams), then you might be measuring your self-worth through your money.

If you find that you routinely use credit cards to get things that make you feel better, but then you feel guilty and stressed every time the bills come around, you are more than likely allowing money to be a distorted measurement of your own worth, whether consciously or not. It is highly important that we tap into “The Principle of Being” (another Principle from my book The Garden of the Soul) to nurture this distortion back to health. In my Garden of the Soul workshop, one of the things I do is take people through a “peeling the onion” exercise where they strip away all the layers of ego until they find the core of the Self, that is not dependent upon time, circumstance, status, money or any other external factor. When we can tap into that resource, we become resilient when stress over money begins to tighten its grip around us.

TODAY’S JOY FORMULA:
Turning Money Stresses into Joy

So many people on the media/Internet talk about “financial freedom”. Well, I have a different view of what this term means, and how to create it. So here’s your “Joy Formula” for this holiday to help you move from stress and anxiety over money and towards a more creative and empowered life:

• Explore the true nature of money as a creative energy that is here in the world to serve you and open up possibilities for self-awareness
• Understand the real reasons why you spend.
• Dive into the emotions you have been trying to express through your spending, and find ways to express them openly.
• Identify all the ways you have attached money to your own self-worth, and strip them away to find the true Self.
• Cut up your credit cards and learn to spend only what you have. This is possibly the most liberating thing I have ever done!
• Find creative ways to decrease your outgoings through refinancing and/or stopping spending on what is not bringing joy into your life.
• Sit down with a notepad write down all the things you could create that could result in more wealth flowing into your life.

And finally…

If you find yourself lying awake at night thinking about unpaid bills, stop your thoughts from running away, and start making a mental inventory of all the little things around your home that make your life fun and joyful. Don’t forget to count the blanket that is wrapped around you as one of them! Then, wrap the blanket more snugly around you, and nestle into a sweet slumber with a smile on your face.

In the next instalment of my “Holiday Survival Guide”
I’ll be talking about how to beat the blues of
FEELINGS OF ISOLATION during the Holiday Season.

Again, it’s not necessarily what you might think!
Be sure you check it out in 3 days’ time.

Like this article? Share it with others… AND be sure to leave your comments and your OWN holiday survival tips below.

5 Easy Ways to Beat the Blues and Feel Joyous this Holiday Season
by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

SO sorry this is late! I actually thought I had posted it before Christmas. So, you’ll be getting 2 posts back-to-back, one today, one tomorrow.

Today we continue our series of tips to help you beat the blues over the holidays:

1. Holiday Blues Number 1: Seasonal Affective Disorder (“SAD”) posted 6 December
2. Holiday Blues Number 2: Seasonal Illnessess, posted 10 Dec
3. Holiday Blues Number 3: Family “Dramas” (in today’s post)
4. Holiday Blues Number 4: Stress over Money (coming Monday 28 December)
5. Holiday Blues Number 5: Feelings of Isolation (coming Thursday 31 December)

TIP: If you want to receive all 5 articles, be sure to subscribe to this blog in the box on the right hand side of your screen.

Surviving Family Dramas during the Holiday Season
For many people, visiting with relatives during the holidays is a wonderful experience, because it allows them to reconnect with loved ones they might not ordinarily see during the rest of the year. But for many others, visiting with parents, siblings and extended family can bring out the worst in us. It’s as if we’ve travelled back in time. We might be the most powerful and respected person in our professional life, but somehow when we are around our childhood families, we change into blithering idiots. By dint of some inexplicable time-warp, we get caught up in the age-old “family dramas” that drive us absolutely batty and leave such a horrible aftertaste when we go back home to our “adult” world. Within minutes, we manage to regress into a juvenile version of ourselves that never shows up under any other circumstances. But what is worse is that we find it nearly impossible to get out of the age-old scripts we have played out since our youth.

Small wonder why I chose to speak about this in a Holiday Survival Guide!

Getting “hooked” into a role
When we get stuck into a family drama, I call it being “hooked.” The reason why we get hooked into our family dramas lies in the term “drama” itself. Think of what a drama is. It’s not merely a judgemental word; it’s actually a very accurate description of what is taking place. A drama is a complex story with complex characters. And our family dramas are no different. When we are hooked, it means we have taken on the role of one of these characters. And, yes, there are cliché roles in which people tend to be cast. In my course “Making Friends with the Monsters Under Your Bed”, I identify some of the typical roles people tend to play, such as “the good girl”, “the black sheep,” “the peacemaker”, “the clown”, “the bully”, “the victim”, “the martyr”, “the loser”, “the rebel”, “the misfit”, and so many others. Combine these with the added subtleties of our identity as being the only, the youngest, the eldest or the middle child (or girl/boy), and we find we really have created some pretty complex characters for ourselves.

Just as a drama on the stage or screen is dependent upon the chemistry and interaction (even if explosive) between the characters, so are our family dramas. Think of your favourite television drama or soap opera, and reflect on how some characters just can’t seem to stop triggering each other, whether passionately, violently or in some other way. So when we find ourselves shouting at someone, “I’m never like this except when I get around you,” it’s actually true. Our role is like a chemical reaction to the stimulus of coming in contact with another character in the play. Just as a good actor can play many different roles, from villain to lover to hero, with equal expertise when given the right script, so too we play different roles when we are working different “scripts” in our day-to-day lives. But the problem is, family scripts tend to get “written” very early in our development, and unless we become aware that we, and our family members, are all reading from the same old script year in and year out, we are unlikely to rewrite it.

How to stop it?
Well, the very first thing needed is to be able to recognise when you are hooked in a role. Simply by recognising your “default characters” when you slip into them can go a long way to making a shift away from them. How do you recognise it? Basically, if you feel weak, out of control, disconnected, ashamed, inauthentic, misunderstood, or incapable of expressing yourself, you might well be hooked in a role. Anger in and of itself is not necessarily a symptom, because anger can also come from an authentic, self-aware state of consciousness. The key is to be truthful about how connected and loving to your own Self you feel. If you do not feel connected and loving to Self, look deeper to see if you can recognise an underlying role.

Once you recognise and acknowledge you are playing one of your old, disempowering roles, notice what kinds of things trigger you. Don’t lay the blame (either outwardly or within your own mind) on another person. Remember: they are just as “hooked” as you are, and if you get entangled in the blame game, you will get nowhere. Instead, take note of the words and scenarios that tend to get you hooked. Really get to know what your triggers are, and take ownership of your reactions to them. It’s actually the most empowering thing you can do.

Realigning
Once you start to recognise your role and identify your triggers, the next thing to do is to practise “stepping aside” when triggers might be tossed your way. I call this “realigning.” If your “drama partner” hurls words at you that traditionally get you worked up, learn how to watch the words as if watching a film. One strategy I teach my clients is to use an anchoring word like, “STOP!” in your mind when you are on the verge of getting hooked. Silently, tell yourself, “Stop!” Some clients also like to use a hand gesture (like touching their thumb to their middle finger, or lightly touching their solar plexus) to bring them to that place of “stopping”. Then, take a breath and mentally step out of the “frame” of this drama, observing it without reacting.

This technique alone can be enough for some, but for others it only delays the outburst until later, because there is so much pent up anger and resentment that it simply has to come out. The aim of stopping is not to make you stuff your emotions or become submissive. It is to give you a breath, so you can bring the situation into your consciousness, and thus give you the ability to take control of your own choices. But if you are really, really hooked into your own drama, it is vital to explore the subtle forces inside of you that keep you attached to the role you play.

Why we cling to a role even if it makes us unhappy
Here’s one common example. If we find ourselves locked into a “victim” role or any role where we believe ourselves to be the “wronged one”, we might unconsciously be gripping very tightly onto that role because it satisfies a part of our identity. Why in the world would we wish to identify with being a victim? Simple. It makes us “right” and another person “wrong.” “But,” you might ask, “I am not a mean, vindictive person; why would I want to make someone else ‘wrong’?” The answer is because we feel weak and powerless inside. And when we feel powerless, this feeling of being “right” might well be the only glimmer of strength we are able to feel within ourselves. So, it makes perfect sense that we will hold onto this role for dear life because we have become so detached from ourselves we cannot see who we are without it. Basically, we are afraid. We fear our lives, if not our very existence, will become meaningless without the shield of being “right”.

And remember, if someone in your life always needs to be right (and it doesn’t matter if they are playing the role of a victim or a bully), that person is actually living with great fear. And here’s the key: when you can step outside the drama just long enough to see how much fear that person is feeling, you are far less likely to attack them or fear them yourself. And the instant you have stepped outside the drama, even for a second or two, and felt this compassion for the other person, you have begun to rewrite the script of your family drama. And that is when real relationships can begin.

TODAY’S JOY FORMULA:
Turning Family Drama into Joy

Here’s a simple Joy Formula for you to try out this holiday season:

• If you are feeling misunderstood, defensive, victimised or out of control, you are probably “hooked”. Don’t blame yourself or anyone else. Instead, congratulate yourself for recognising it.

• Take note of the “triggers” that get you hooked. Again, don’t fall into the blame game. It only gives your power away. Instead, take ownership for what you choose to do with those triggers.
• Use a silent mental anchoring word like “Stop” and/or hand gesture to break your pattern of reacting to the trigger.
• Breathe!
• Mentally step out of the scene and start to rewrite the script. Here are some ideas. Bad script formula: “You always make me feel x, y, z”
  • Bad script formula: “You’re always so x, y, z”
  • Good script formulas (in the right tone of voice, of course!): “I hear that you feel a, b, c when I said/did, x, y, z. What would really help me is to know what you would like me to say/do so you don’t feel this way” -OR- “When you said/did x, y, z, I feel a, b, c. I would really help me is if you said/did q, r, s.”
  • Note that what you DON’T want to say is that the person “made you” feel a certain way, or that the person is the problem. Focus on specific things the person said or did, tell them how the words or deed impact you (not making it their fault) and tell/ask them for what you want. This way, the person knows exactly what isn’t working for you, and you would like from them. Bear in mind that the other person might continue to play out the drama and not react very positively at first. If that happens, just keep rewriting the script. Believe me, if you do it enough times, the drama breaks and you start to speak to each other quite differently.

Being hooked by our unconscious roles and “old scripts” can frequently be so deep-rooted that people cannot easily identify them, even though they know something within them is causing much pain and heartache. The process of moving from unconsciousness to clarity and awareness is beyond the scope of this article, but if you want to explore it further, I do invite you to contact me for a consultation by filling in a request form at http://www.create-a-life.co.uk/free_consultation_request.html

I hope the information in this article has given you some useful tips for achieving greater joy over the holidays when you spend time with your families.

In the next instalment of my “Holiday Survival Guide”
I’ll be talking about how to beat the blues of
STRESS OVER MONEY (!) during the Holiday Season.

Again, it’s not necessarily what you might think!
Be sure you check it out TOMORROW.

Like this article? Share it with others… AND be sure to leave your comments and your OWN holiday survival tips below.

Allison Maslan, author of Blast off!

Author and Coach Allison Maslan Helps You ‘Blast Off’ in 2010

by Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC

Like this article? Share it with others

These days, the market is flooded with self-help books. Unfortunately, all too many of them leave me feeling dull and lifeless, and they don’t really “help” very much. Half of the books I come across hit you over the head with “power talk” that makes you feel guilty for not being rich or for getting the occasional cold (I won’t mention names, but I have indeed tossed more than one self-help book across the room because of this!). The other half usually drown you in lofty “woo woo” language that never quite gets down to practical action. Frustrating! For a new self-help book to stand out from the crowd and become keeper in my library, it would need to be friendly, engaging, fun AND practical. In other words, it would actually have to HELP me help myself. In her new book Blast Off! The Surefire Success Plan to Launch Your Dreams into Reality, author, coach and registered homeopath Allison Maslan, has achieved exactly that. Her book is a step-by-step programme to achieving some of the most challenging and important goals in life: career, relationship, health, fun/adventure, and of course financial security. In my own experience as a coach, I know that when people wish to make positive changes in their lives in any of these areas, they can frequently feel overwhelmed. I know that there are two keys to helping them get started: 1) make the challenge feel light and fun and 2) break the challenge into smaller, and not so daunting, chunks. Maslan uses both of these strategies in her book Blast Off! Her creative and colourful use of language (Daily Launch Tools, Weekly Flight Assessments, etc) and her easy break-downs of tasks and targets (Sun-up Scripts, Mini-Feats, etc) give Blast Off! a quality of lightness that helps readers believe they can and will achieve their goals and aspirations. But most importantly, Maslan keeps the reader focussed on the bigger picture: life purpose and the path of your whole life. Thus, unlike other books that might just focus on one aspect of life, like money, relationships or health, Blast Off! is a holistic handbook for creating the life you want to live. Written with a charm that immediately makes you feel at home, Allison avoids the downfalls of so many other self-help authors (no condescending “power talk”, no airy-fairy stuff). With Blast Off!, Allison Maslan has written an accessible, inviting and honest handbook, with a sweet, down-to-earth charm and practical action steps. The combination results in something that is both believable and useful. In other words, this is one self-help book that actually IS showing you how to help yourself. Blast Off!, along with the excellent organised companion Workbook, is kind of like having a life coach in a book. Certainly worth checking out to enhance your New Year’s resolutions in 2010.

Blast Off! The Surefire Success Plan to Launch Your Dreams into Reality by Allison Maslan is coming to Amazon on 19 January 2010. I have joined up with over 20 other mind-body-spirit professionals to help celebrate the release of this special book. Together, we are giving away an array of very special gifts to everyone who purchases the book during its launch. To find out how you can receive these gifts, go to http://www.myblastoff.com/booklaunch.

Like this article? Share it with others

Sample Vison Board from Blastation

This week I took this cutting edge new sofware programme (developed by Allison Maslan) for a spin. After reading this review (I give you screen shots of the programme and describe the features pretty fully), take Blastation for a test drive yourself on a FREE 30-day trial http://ow.ly/KMx.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About a year ago, I attended a course with Patrick Ryan called “Awakened Wisdom”. On that course, I set many goals for myself to achieve over the next 2 years and beyond. Now, I know that I am absolutely USELESS when it comes to keeping paper documents, so I wanted to make some sort of computer-based tracking system for myself to create my 2-year targets and then break them down into smaller chunks (monthly, weekly, daily). I used an Excel spreadsheet and put all kinds of pretty colours on it. I used a different colour for each time frame: one for “Life Dream” and one for the year, month, week and day. I called it my “15-minute focus” because I didn’t want to spend gobs of time on it every day, or I wouldn’t get any work done. Instead, I wanted to use it as a way to focus my vision on the bigger picture every day, and keep my perspective on how my daily activities were working towards that goal. Here’s a screen shot of what it looked like almost exactly 1 year ago (hahah… notice that my “Life Dream” last Christmas was that my book The Garden of the Soul sold 30 million copies… I’m still working on that one!):

Well, I have to say, it did work pretty well and kept me on target for a while. If I look back at it now, most of the things I had set out to do were all pretty much achieved, and most of those things that weren’t achieved were replaced with stuff that was even better. I found this method so useful that I even shared it with several of my coaching clients, who liked it very much.

But after a couple of months, it started to get a bit of clumsy and I tended not to use it as much as I did when I first made it. There were too many words, too much scrolling up and down, no real way to “see” visually what I had achieved. I found it took me a lot longer than 15 minutes a day, because of the way it was laid out, and it didn’t really replace my need to use a daily diary quite separately from this (which I developed on yet another spreadsheet). Sometimes I found myself forgetting where I had written things down because I needed so many different places to write them!

But lo’ and behold, only a few months ago, a woman named Allison Maslan came into my life, asking me to coach her around creating a marketing campaign for her upcoming book Blast Off!. Well, of course I was really pleased to meet such a wonderful new client, and get to work on such a fun book campaign, but the bonus surprise for me was when she showed me Blastation – an online software programme she had designed for exactly the same purpose as my 15-Minute Focus spreadsheet…

But seeing them side-by-side was like comparing an old 78 rpm gramophone to a digital surround-sound system. Blastation was everything I had wanted my spreadsheet to be, but it did it all faster, prettier and more visually. It overcame every single one of the drawbacks of my home-made goals-setting spreadsheet had. Heck, it even used a similar colour scheme as I had chosen for my 15-Minute Focus, only a lot bolder and more eye-catching. I had to laugh when I saw that. It was just too perfect.

Blastation gives you 6 major areas of life in which to set goals: career, relationships, wealth, spiritual life, health and personal fulfilment (which includes FUN!).

For each of these areas, you set your “Big Picture Vision”, your “mile steps” and then your “mini-feats.” That’s very similar to the way I had my system laid out, only more streamlined. Then, it also gives you a “sunup script” which sort of reminds me of the “morning pages” Julia Cameron uses in The Artist’s Way (which I use with a lot of my clients). It also has “rocket words” which are basically your self-pep talk (or affirmations) for the day. It allows you to upload pictures, so it’s not all words, words, words.

AND do you know what? It even has a calendar that you can integrate with Outlook. I couldn’t believe it when I saw this.

But the thing I really, really liked was the “Life-o-Meter”. It’s like a petrol gauge that shows you how much you are living up to your goals. Every time you achieve a goal on time it sends you up the gauge towards 100%. Pretty cool, yes?

It also comes with excellent tutorials and guidance on how to use it effectively. Frankly, I’m going to recommend Blastation to my clients because it really is a great way to set goals, and stay motivated as you move towards them. And for coaches, it’s a great way for you to monitor your clients’ progress.

I rarely (if ever) talk about online coaching products, but this particular one just felt so fun and so USEFUL, I really wanted to review it and let people take it for a spin. Allison offers a 30-day free trial of the software, so you can see for yourself whether you think it could help you move closer to your life dreams.

And I do think a few months’ subscription would also make a really unique Christmas gift. Check out Blastation HERE.

My rating?  5-stars for:

• usefulness
• easy-of-use
• aesthetic appearance
• originality
• and FUN!

Like this article? Share it with others!

But all too often, “some day” and the “big break” don’t come. This isn’t because we are unlucky or have “bad karma.” It’s because we are looking in the wrong direction to find the solutions to our lack of fulfilment. After going through my own transformations in life, teaching thousands of students over the years, working with hundreds of coaching clients and interviewing dozens of fascinating people on my radio show, I have learned one thing: the circumstances of our lives cannot be blamed (or at least not 100%) for our unhappiness. What are some of the worst circumstances you can imagine? Try to imagine being a 6-year-old boy and being exiled with no possessions and left to starve to death in the Siberian wasteland. Or how about being a teenage girl whose father murders her own mother in cold blood, marries her mother’s sister, and is then acquitted by the court? Can you imagine living with such things? Can you imagine surviving them to such a point where you felt so full of joy that you have made it your life’s work to spread joy to others? But it’s true. I have met these people,* and so many others, in my work. And happiness, I have found, is 100% a matter of allowing it to happen. But if we are blocking the pipeline to our own happiness, it will never flow.

There are many ways we block this pipeline to happiness. One is the unconscious way we talk about ourselves. Most of us pay little attention to the subtle ways we verbally undermine ourselves, whether in our heads or aloud, on an almost continual basis. Another way we get in our own way are all the “old stories” we tell about ourselves, such as “That’s just the way I am” or “I’m really bad with x, y, z.” A third way we block our own happiness is the almost autonomic way we tend to slip into “roles” in different circumstances. We might unthinkingly adopt a powerless, voiceless or even aggressive role in certain family, social or professional scenarios, for example. Both we and others begin to mistake these roles for ourselves, and we end up feeling drained and misunderstood. The end result of all these “monsters” is that we become disconnected to both our real emotions and from our bodily awareness. We can even become weakened or ill on a physical level and we certainly become desensitized to the “hero’s call” that is always around us. When we reach this level of disconnection, we can become resigned to our “lot” life, and lose faith that we can ever truly be happy.

But as I said, I passionately believe that every human being is a hero, and all of these things are part of the hero’s journey—even the struggle to come back to the Self. Every hero is a hero because he or she has faced the “monster” no one else had the courage to face. All the old stories, all the roles, all the self-talk, all the feelings of fear, anger, blame and loss—these are the monsters. And when we face them and come out the other side with the wisdom that only a true hero knows, we find the elixir that makes our lives, and the lives of those around us, truly magical.

This month at the Bedford and West Herts Wellness Circle I will be doing a mini-workshop about the hero’s journey, so you can get a tiny glimpse into where you are on the path. And if you’d like to step fully into that journey, be sure to sign up for the “Transformation Trilogy” that is starting THIS Saturday and Sunday (17/18 Oct) in Bedford. The Trilogy is a set of three weekend workshops spread over three months. You do NOT have to attend all three weekends, as they are completely separate courses, but you see the progression from course to course if you do. This weekend, we’ll be “Making Friends with the Monsters Under Your Bed” where we will be looking at all the things I have spoken about in this article, so that you will be REALLY ready to step into your inner hero in Workshop 2, “Becoming the Hero of Your Own Life”, in November.

NOTE:  We urgently need 5 more people to sign up for this weekend’s “Monsters” to give the course “buzz”. PLEASE book with me via telephone no later than 8pm Wednesday 14 May. Click HERE to read all information AND to book your place.

* The 6-year-old boy is author Andrew Bienkowski, and the teenage girl is actress Brenda Adelman, both extraordinary people I interviewed on my radio show. Click links above to listen to those great past shows.

Hi everyone,
Lynn Serafinn from Create-a-Life here. There is no denying that we live at a time in history where much of the world around us is changing. The changing economy is proving to be challenging for many. Climate change and the need to move away from fossil fuel dependency are becoming more and more apparent. At the same time, we are also seeing more and more people moving away from old ways of thinking, and shifting towards a more holistic and spiritual approach to life, embracing the values of personal growth and self-awareness.

Yes, we can see that society and the world at large is truly “in transition”. Transition brings change, and change brings regeneration– a chance for new beginnings. And while the prospect of change can be exciting, going through the process of change can also be daunting.

But what if the change were a beautiful journey? And what if at the other end of that journey, you found you were not only able to face your fears and stand powerfully amidst the changes, but you were also able to discover your life’s calling, see your personal impact in the world, and claim a lasting legacy that says “I was here”?

This is the journey of Transformation.
And I would like to invite you to join me on it.

ANNOUNCING…
THE TRANSFORMATION TRILOGY
WEEKEND WORKSHOPS

Bedford, Bedfordshire (Oct, Nov, Dec 2009)
Totnes, Devon (Nov, Dec 2009, Jan 2010)

What is the Transformation Trilogy?
The Transformation Trilogy is a set of 3 non-residential weekend courses that help enable you to be the change you want to see in the world, and find out how your own transformation can create a new, exciting and more harmonious way of living for yourself, and for those around you.

Using the metaphor of “the Garden” to represent the Self (as depicted in my book The Garden of the Soul), each weekend covers in depth the 3 stages of transformation:

• “Weeding”: Making Friends with the Monsters Under Your Bed. Understanding self-sabotage; recognising your own limiting beliefs; strategies to relign your old patterns; reconnecting to your authentic self; integrating your awareness into your personal and professional relationships.
• “Seeding”: Becoming the Hero of Your Own Life (co-led with Vicki Goodyear). Hearing the call; facing your own resistance; understanding the hero’s journey; claiming your life purpose; seeing your impact; visioning your legacy; telling your hero’s story; stepping into your Authentic Hero in your personal and professional relationships.
• “Feeding”: The Garden of the Soul. Four Principles to help you restore balance and sustain connection to your Authentic Self. The Principle of Giving (passion, self-expression, etc); the Principle of Receiving (sense awareness, refilling your energy, etc); the Principle of Becoming (letting go of old emotions, rebirth, lessons from childhood, etc); the Principle of Being (peeling the onion; meeting who you are); integrating these principles in your personal and professional relationships.

Who is the Transformation Trilogy for?

• Anyone who finds it challenging or uncomfortable to express themselves clearly and openly in their work, family or personal relationships
• Anyone who wishes to find their Life Purpose, connect to their Higher Self, and express themselves more authentically in their lives, career and relationships
• Groups, teams and communities who wish to improve their interpersonal communication and relationships, both with each other and with external organisations or groups
• Managers and HR who want to be able to inspire and motivate staff rather than dictate and dominate
• Teachers, healers, counsellors, community workers and anyone who serves the public, who would like to be able to empower both themselves and others to become more self-reliant, balanced and confident
• Special invitation to Transition Town teams and other social reform groups, who want to gain valuable skills in knowing why people stay “stuck” or resistant to change, and how to facilitate the “inner transition” in their communities with ease and compassion. We will explore how to maintain and replenish your own energetic and creative resources when working with group energies, how to see what is needed in a challenging situation, and how to retain and return to your “centre” so you don’t “lose yourself” when faced with the process of change.

When and where are the Transformation Trilogy Workshops taking place?

Series 1: Bedford, Bedfordshire:
17/18 Oct; 14/15 Nov; 12/13 Dec

• Venue: Function Room, George & Dragon, 39 Mill Street, Bedford, MK40 3EU
• Travel: 15 min walk from Bedford train station; 5 min walk from Bedford bus station; car park within short walking distance
• Time: 9.30am – 5pm (Registration/coffee starts from 8.45 on Saturday)
• Food: Tea and coffee will be provided throughout the day. Lunch can be purchased separately either at the George and Dragon, or at any of the numerous cafes within easy walking distance.

Series 2: Totnes, Devon:
7/8 Nov; 5/6 Dec; 9/10Jan

• Venue: Rudolf Steiner School South Devon, Dartington, Totnes, Devon, TQ9 6AB
• Travel: About 3 miles outside Totnes Town centre. More details to follow.
• Time: 9.30am – 5pm (Registration/coffee starts from 8.45 on Saturday)
• Food: Tea and coffee will be provided throughout the day. You will have ample time to go into town for lunch, or you may join us in a group lunch where  everyone brings something to share.

About the workshop leaders…

Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC is an award-winning transformation coach/teacher, best-selling author, public speaker, personal development trainer, radio host, Founder of the Global Wellness Circle and Chair of Transition Bedford. Originally from the US, but living in Bedford, Bedfordshire, Lynn is co-active leadership graduate and brings with her years of experience in both the educational field and the music industry. She is highly creative and creates a sense of fun and permission to play full-out in all around her.

* * * * *

Vicki Goodyear is a co-active coach, NLP practitioner, co-active leadership graduate and active workshop leader living in Totnes, Devon.  She brings with her years of experience as a dancer, nurse and holistic body therapist. She is also a licensed leader of the “Mastery of Self-Expression”, an acting-based workshop which uses performance to help others learn how to express their authentic selves. In all she does, Vicki uses her keen intuition and sense of play to help others learn how to surrender, let go of inner resistance, get centred, and connect with both self and others.

* * * * *

What do the workshops cost?
We are extremely sensitive to the current economic climate, and we would love to see you every single one of you (and your friends!) on these courses. To ensure that everyone who wants to attend is able to manage it financially, Vicki and I have decided to try an experiment we are calling the “Gratitude System”.

Normally these workshops would be £197-£247 per weekend, depending on the cost of the venue, but with the Gratitude System, we are asking that you pay a nominal non-refundable deposit of only £45 to cover some basic expenses. Then on Sunday after the course is over, you will be asked to give a cash gift of any amount to show your gratitude. This gift will be completely anonymous, and should be proportionate to YOUR financial ability, and to what you feel you gained from the course. This way, even those who are on low income should be able to attend.

We trust the integrity of our attendees. Any and all gifts, no matter how humble, will be accepted with love and gratitude.

BOOK YOUR PLACE NOW

Select your workshop(s)

Bedford – Monsters workshop £45.00 Bedford – Hero workshop £45.00 Bedford – Garden workshop £45.00 Bedford – Complete Trilogy £120.00 Totnes – Monsters workshop £45.00 Totnes – Hero workshop £45.00 Totnes – Garden workshop £45.00 Totnes – Complete Trilogy £120.00

What have people said about the Transformation Trilogy workshops?

“Awesome and exquisite. A life-changing experience!”
-Tebogo Machethe, entrepreneur
Johannesburg, South Africa

* * * * *

“I highly recommend this course! I loved the format, the structure, the clarity, the focus. The workbooks, with their concrete steps and spaces to be filled in, work very well … the program was very informative and very experimental …. I really liked how you inspired people … to integrate it into their lives. Lynn, I acknowledge you for your presence, your devotion, your powerful questioning and your love for the truth! I admire you as a woman, a coach, a teacher, a leader, for being courageous, and for encouraging others to claim the voice to express in their unique powerful way so we all make a difference on this planet.”
-Sabrina Werkmeister – Co-Active Coach
Maui, Hawaii

* * * * *

‘… Lynn had so much energy, passion and enthusiasm … It exceeded my expectations … I will highly recommend it to others … I got lots of great tips and tools to use with my students … and can apply many aspects to my work by incorporating things I learned today with the young people at the college.”
-Annie Manning – College Lecturer
Carshalton College, UK

* * * * *

‘… I have now learned to quieten the negative voices and listen to the strong positive voice inside. I have learned that knowing that you can and acting like you can help in the belief that anything is possible. And the most poignant thing I learned is that I am worthy, capable, versatile, gorgeous and great at anything I put my mind to.’
-Angela Mitchell – Vocalist, Music Producer, Teacher
South London, UK

* * * * *

What people have said about Lynn…

“Lynn is a brilliant and creative out-of-the-box thinker. Her impact is powerful…”
-Patrick Ryan, CPCC
Co-Active Coach, Author of The Eagle’s Call
Founder, Awakened Wisdom Experience
Vancouver, Canada

* * * * *

“Lynn has a gift for getting straight to the heart of your problem and is then tenacious enough to make you stick with it, while letting you work out the answers for yourself. She is direct, kind and one of the most spiritual people I have met.”
-Catherine Rose – Coaching Client
Author of The Bone Cradle
Bedfordshire

* * * * *

FAQs
Do I need to take all 3 workshops?
No. There is certainly a progression to the trilogy, and I encourage you to take all three if you can, as you will gain the most if you do. However, each workshop can be taken on its own and you will still gain quite a lot.

What if I end up not being able to attend after registering?
As the deposit is being used to cover expeneses, it is non-refundable. However, if you do have to cancel due to illness or other emergency (especially with all this flu going around!), you can either offer it to a friend, or apply it to another workshop or workshop series we will run in 2010. Venues to be announced in late 2009.

I’m not sure if I can make it. Will you be running them again soon?
We will be running the Trilogy in various locations in the UK in 2010, but it is unlikely we will return to either Bedfordshire or Devon before 8-10 months. As our numbers are limited on each course, if you are pretty certain you would like to attend, we recommend booking now and coming to a later series if you are unable to make it.

Won’t You Join Us for This Journey of Transformation?

SPACES ARE LIMITED.
PLEASE BOOK AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

Select your workshop(s)

Bedford – Monsters workshop £45.00 Bedford – Hero workshop £45.00 Bedford – Garden workshop £45.00 Bedford – Complete Trilogy £120.00 Totnes – Monsters workshop £45.00 Totnes – Hero workshop £45.00 Totnes – Garden workshop £45.00 Totnes – Complete Trilogy £120.00

For more information, please
contact Lynn Serafinn at:

Email: lynn [at] lynnserafinn [dot] com

Telephone: 0845 880 25 28

Website: http://www.lynnserafinn.com

Warm wishes,
Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC
Author, Personal Transformation Coach, Trainer and Speaker
“Turning up the volume of the music in your heart!”

Lynn Serafinn’s Cosmic Universe (main site/blog)
www.lynnserafinn.com

Create-a-Life Coaching and Training
www.create-a-life.co.uk

Tel: 44+ (0)845 880 25 28

It’s a paradox. Effective “awareness raising” is in many ways “awareness grounding”.

What I mean by that is that we tend to think that “raising” awareness in people is a matter of telling them facts and details so they may understand the urgency of an issue as crucial as climate change and peak oil. But it is my observation that when people become over-saturated with sensory and mental data, far from this raising their consciousness, they actually go numb. It’s called “overwhelm”. I used to be that way earlier in life (and I get back there occasionally when I don’t take care of myself). When the issues of life became too much for me to bear, I became numb, disconnected and resigned. This is a spiritual tragedy for any individual. But when an entire culture becomes numb, it is not only a tragedy, it is a recipe for societal self-destruction.

My good friend Karen Maycey, who came from Manchester to speak at the Bedford Wellness Circle on Monday, went through this process of overwhelm when she was first diagnosed with stage-2 breast cancer last year. Karen has always been a very active “go-getter” in her work as a coach and workshop leader, and prior to that as an international tour guide. She had always been on the constant run all over the planet. But shortly after she was first diagnosed, and via a very intense group healing session in which I participated, she intuitively came up with a motto for herself, which was, “When we slow down, there we are.” And what she found when she did that, were all the answers to what was needed to restore balance and make herself well. At that point in time, she opted to refuse modern treatment of chemotherapy and radiation, and embarked on a highly demanding regime of natural therapies. This required immense commitment from her, but the truth is, when she slowed down long enough to listen to her body, she realised that it was what she needed to do to restore balance to the entire system.

Similarly, my colleague Shane Hughes from the Bedford Transition Initiating Group told me, “Permaculture is supposed to be 90% observation. I’m currently going through a process of observing insects in a field and it’s amazing how much more I see the longer you observe. It’s as if in the first instance my senses are almost numb and need tuning and then go through several step changes in my level of perception and sensitivity to what is actually there.” We can only truly understand a system when we slow down and come to understand what is actually present within it and how it is moving. And when we see the underlying way that the world is operating, we come to understand more deeply what it needs. What we invariably find is that these needs are not met simply by addressing external issues, but must satisfy the spirit and essence of the greater system, whether it is an individual person, a society, or a planet.

From my experience, as a college teacher, a coach and a person who has lived over half a century on the planet, taking initiatives without the “inner transition” never sticks. We teachers used to have to set so-called “SMART” targets for students. The end result was that while they might indeed complete their work (but frequently not), the learning and the life-change was negligible. The reason for this is that these not-so-smart targets only ever addressed “issues” (i.e., getting the coursework done, etc) and never got beneath the surface to dreams, motivations and all the things that are sustainable. Similarly, our Transition Bedford initiative (and the greater Transition Town movement) is not only going to involve looking at the “issues”, but it absolutely will require each of us getting very deep into the hearts and minds of the people of our town, and then creating a plan that addresses what we find, so we can sustain the inner energy of the people.

When I coach, people come to me with “issues” too; what I find invariably is that the issue is simply a symptom of an imbalance between body, mind and heart, which in turn creates a detachment from essence/source. People will continue to pillage the earth and exploit each other until that inner balance is restored and they begin to feel reconnected. Therefore, it is very important first and foremost that everyone who takes on a role within a Transition Town initiating group is given the opportunity to processes their anger, fear, doubts, frustration and overwhelm, within a collaborative and aligned support network, and then moves towards the connection, compassion and trust that is needed to carry out this incredibly profound “turning” in our history. From this place, we become a much more powerful entity, as we become no only connected to ourselves and to each other, but also to the energy of the space (i.e., the town, the rest of humanity, the Earth, Existence) itself.

From a personal perspective, this is where I see my greatest contribution can come into the Transition movement. I personally take it upon myself to work with others towards cultivating that inner transition—the “Great Turning” of human spirit. I trust that capable people, such as Shane and others in my initiating group and other groups throughout the world, will learn and carry out all the necessary work for the “outer transition”, such as the fundamental reskilling of food production, teaching permaculture, creating energy alternatives, and so many other wonderful things, which will actualise the intentions we set.

The desire to jump directly into action towards this outer transition is likely to be our natural tendency. As our inner transition evolves, and our eyes begin to open, we begin to notice more and more things in the world around us. And as we are all creative by nature, it is our human response that we feel the urge to act. For instance, these days, because I am more aware, I have been noticing more and more food-bearing trees and plants here in Bedford. I even enjoyed plucking and eating some juicy wild yellow plums along Goldington Road last Saturday. Then, the other day I noticed that there are probably at least 30 fruit-bearing cherry trees on Howbury St. There is also a massive apple tree and pear tree, both in the car park of a business (and unlikely to be harvested or of use to the owners). So of course my mind went into creation mode and I thought, “How about piloting the abundance project (harvesting and distributing) local fruit) with a ‘Howbury St Abundance Project?” But then, of course, I admittedly don’t even know if the cherries are actually edible. This requires someone more knowledgeable than myself. Harvesting also requires someone knowledgeable, some tools and a group of people to do it. Distribution would require coordination, and publicity would need to be designed and executed.

All of these are the “doing” things. These are the actions needed to carry out such a project, even on a small scale. But before we take any action, we need to create the “message” and intention to address the question of ”Why bother?” that people will surely ask. They will inevitably ask, “Why bother harvesting trees on Howbury St? Why should I care? How can this make a difference? How can this save the planet? Isn’t it like trying to empty the ocean one teaspoon at a time?”

And here again is how “numbness” happens with people. When the mission seems so overwhelming that they cannot envision it, people will simply give up. It is important to remember that this shutting down, or “numbness”, is actually one of our natural, emotional reactions to fear. It happens when our brains get flooded with too much info, and we begin to feel small and thus overwhelmed. It actually happens to us at a physical, mechanistic level; the amygdale at the base of our brain reacts by shutting down and tuning out when the sense of overwhelm triggers too much fear for it to handle.

If we start this Transition Town movement on the foundation of our own sense of fear and urgency, the likely result is that we will overwhelm others and they will become (or continue to be) numb. But even more importantly, if we fuel our own energy with a sense of fear and urgency, we will also flood our minds and bodies with stress and frustration, and we will burn out and give up. Just as fossil fuel is a non-sustainable energy source because it is non-replenishable, fear and anger are also not sources of sustainable emotional energy. They may be very useful in short-term crises, but when something requires sustained action and attention, they impair our inner sustainability and resilience.

It is, therefore, important for us to access different sources of energy for our own inner resilience. We need to tap into a sustainable supply of emotional energy. The most vibrant source of sustainable emotional energy is our ability to envision and hold the “bigger picture.” What is the bigger picture? The bigger picture cannot be focussed on what we are trying to avoid; it must be solely focussed on what we wish to create. One of my mentors, Patrick Ryan, is a race car driver and he says that when a driver goes into a spin, if he thinks, “I mustn’t hit the wall,” his attention automatically goes towards the wall and he is more likely to hit it because that is where his eyes are focussed. Instead, race car drives are trained to look at the centre of the field, so when they find themselves in a crisis, their natural instinct will be to drive directly to safety.

In much the same way, in starting our Transition Town initiative, we must set our eyes upon one thing and one thing only. Rather than putting our eyes on what we wish to avoid, we must clearly see the world in which we want to live, and that in which we want our great-great-grandchildren to live. We must dream bigger and more beautifully than we ever have before. During this process, we must not ask ourselves “How will we get there?” or say things like, “That seems impossible.” We must simply say, “This is our dream.” Once we are filled with the dream, we will have enough sustainable inner energy to address the “how to’s” and begin to create a practical plan of action. If we move into action without the dream and the inner connection to it, we will simply be focussing on the nightmare. And if we are focussing on the nightmare, the public will sense it, and they will collectively respond to it with anger, fear, resistance, overwhelm, numbness and apathy.

As we move towards this transition, it will be our job to hold that dream, that “bigger picture” and inspire the public, so the vision of this future becomes so powerful that grabs people by the heartstrings. It will then become such an irresistible force that they will simply insist they are a part of that dream. It will be our role to reach the positive emotions and natural creativity of people so that they are literally ringing us off the hook to get involved. If we make the dream so visible in our own eyes that others cannot help but see it themselves, they will become eager and active participants in the action to move towards it.

So to start the process of “awareness raising,” we must first start with ourselves. We already know the issues. But issues are not “awareness.” Become aware of our own sources of inner resilience and groundedness. Create the dream together. Be visible. Make the dream visible to others. Stay resilient. Learn how to recover when you are out of balance and return to being grounded. Then, take hold of the dream again. Claim it. Just keep being visible. Every time you are visible, holding the dream, someone else will want to step into it. Have no doubt that we will eventually, whether within our lifetime or not, reach a tipping point where the dream becomes the status quo.

And this is how we will transform the world.

Lynn Serafinn, MAED, CPCC
Transformation Coach at Create-a-Life
Founder of the Global Wellness Circle
Chair, Transition Bedford Initiating Group
Author of The Garden of the Soul: lessons from four flowers that unearth the Self

Lynn delivers bespoke workshops for Transition Town groups. See her offerings on the “School of Everything” website, or contact her directly at lynn [at] lynnserafinn [dot] com